Bronnie Ware is a nurse who has worked many years in palliative care. Her patients were those who had gone home to die and she was there with them during the last three to twelve weeks of their lives. Now I am aware that this may be a morbid topic for some but stay with me. Bronnie was there with these people during their final days and as such was privy to their final thoughts regarding their lives. She even compiled a list of the top five regrets of the dying. As I read through the list, the first regret listed really touched a chord in my heart. The number one regret of the dying is that they wish they had had the courage to live a life true to themselves and not the life others expected of them. Wow! That one made me pause. I felt a stirring within my heart, as I asked myself, am I living a life true to myself?
You don’t have to be on your deathbed to feel this regret!
This thought stayed with me over the next few days and I spent some time pondering it. I then realized something, you don’t have to be on your deathbed to feel this regret. I have felt it in my early twenties. I made a decision to follow a path that wasn’t my heart’s choosing. I felt the pressure and desire of another’s expectations and went with that instead. What a disaster! I don’t regret it anymore because I believe that you get a second chance to choose your heart’s desires and I have been so blessed to have been given that chance. I don’t blame the other person for my choice, either. I did make the choice after all. But, I take a pause and imagine, what if I had not been given that second chance? My heart cramps at the thought. And I have to be honest, I was in a terrible state when I was faced with my second chance. I didn’t so much choose to live true to myself out of incredible bravery, but rather out of the knowledge that if I didn’t choose my heart’s path, this time, I was going to die a small death inside, all over again.
Perhaps my heart’s calling is no longer the same as it had been when I was twenty and that is OKAY!
Here’s the thing, it is not always easy to live a life true to yourself. But it is worth it! Remember, the changes don’t need to happen all at once. For me, it began with a simple question. Can I see myself doing this work and living this life in 5 years’ time? My answer was short and simple. No. I just said no. I didn’t justify and say to myself, well if this or that happens, then maybe. I took away the option to be kinda okay. It was yes or it was no. After that, it became a process of listening to what my heart had to say. I knew that I had grown and life had shaped me. Perhaps my hearts calling was no longer the same as it had been when I was twenty and that was okay. So I learned and prayed and researched until I found a direction. It is a small beacon and even as I write this post, it is not clearly defined yet. But it is a compass pointing me to where my heart’s calling lies.
Will I be satisfied living for Friday?
Am I living a life true to myself now? Yes, I am. I have walked away from the life I thought I should be living and moved towards a life that felt more authentic. Now, many people thought I was crazy for doing this and were shocked that I had decided on this step. What if it goes wrong? What if you fail? What if, what if…that question will drive you crazy. So instead, ask yourself, what if I don’t? What if I don’t take a small step in the direction of my true self, what regrets will I reap? Will I be satisfied living the rest of my days for Friday? Is it really okay for me to wake up on a Monday morning and know that I could be doing more with my life? Should I really be choosing the easier path that will result in me being angry and frustrated? Is it really okay that I never have time for my family, my friends or my health? That is a whole lot of questions there! Have you ever asked yourself these things? Have you ever wondered what your heart was telling you?
“People are capable, at any time in their lives, of doing what they dream of.”
― Paulo Coelho, The Alchemist
I am simply going to ask you two questions.
- Are you living a life that is true to yourself?
- Can you imagine yourself doing this work and living this life in 5 years’ time?
If you said NO, and are now feeling a sensation beginning to stir, a desire to make a change, I want you to take a moment to consider that feeling. One of my favourite quotes from The Alchemist states that “people are capable, at ANY TIME in their lives, of doing what they dreamt of.” Maybe you have a desire to start your own thing. To be your own boss. Perhaps, it’s a business idea that your heart has been quietly telling you about. Whatever it is, we would like to help you with that.
As you may be aware, this site is a platform to offer assistance and direction in the world of online business and entrepreneurship. We specialize in helping people that seek freedom by starting their own online business and managing their time on their terms.
If this is something that touches a chord within your heart, then please reach out to us here and let’s arrange a short 10 min conversation. There is nothing for sale. We just want to see if we can help you.